When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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