White coat. Heels.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize
