The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
