I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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