Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
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