I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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