is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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