I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
