and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
