You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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