I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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