Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
