dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
