i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
