Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
