I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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