super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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