im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
