there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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