I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
This can only be settled by a dance off.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
