Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Randomize
