can we get nightvision for the apartment?
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
high people should be assigned attendants
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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