I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize