I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
