a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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