I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
