haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Randomize
