I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I hate all girls vehemently.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
