I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
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