she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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