Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I have aggressive nipples.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
