a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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