if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
