i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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