I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
