I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Define "chronic" masturbator.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
