erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
