I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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