Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
