My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
