You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Still dying that you shit outside
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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