I'm really into asian looking animals
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Actions speak louder than pants.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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