I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
