this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
