i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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