I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
