Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
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