cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
