I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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