We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
